Michael Hawkes
Dennis Casalinuova
Mary Aycock's Family
Monday, December 22, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Dennis' Story
Siblings are very special peoples in our lives. I have always felt so grateful for my sibling. We have a bond that not many brother and sisters have. We rarely argue and I am so grateful for this. My brother and I have are similar in many ways; however, differ in others. We both have addictive personalities. Addictive personalities run in our families to many different things. I like to think that I "lucked out" when it comes to what my mind is addicted too; however, others think I'm out of my mind. My addictions run a multitude of differences from cleaning to even numbers to chocolate. My luck I like to think stems from my addictions being to things that aren't harmful to my body (well, besides the waistline!). My dear brother was not so fortunate with his addictive personality. His addictions are to alcohol and drugs. This is an addiction has run in my family for years, continues to run in my family, and will forever run in family. It is difficult to sit and watch the ones you love more than yourself harm themselves in such a way. My heart aches for my brother. I have tried many a times to talk with him and seek the reason for this addiction. I think some of it has to do with my parents separation when he was 18 and some comes from him losing his first real love to the "separate college" situation. I even have thought that some of his addiction is because of me. I feel that if I was there for him he wouldn't need alcohol. There are just so many confusions that run through my mind daily about him and I just don't have a pinpoint answer.
My brother went on a bad bing a year ago around the holidays. He would leave home (this is when we were both living with my father) and not come home for a day or two. We'd get no phone calls to let us know where he was... nothing. It didn't dawn on me until this started happening that there was something more going on than just alcohol. In the midst of a blackout last January my brother hit a parked car on the way home from the bar. The next morning he went out to his truck and had no idea why the passenger side of his GMC truck was totaled. It was at this moment that he admitted to my mother that was hooked on cocaine. He broke down to tears, probably the second time I've ever heard my brother to cry (the first being when my mom told him she was leaving our dad). My brother had a problem. He stopped drinking and doing drugs for about three weeks until he couldn't stay sober any more and dove back into the underworld. One Wednesday night in April he came home at 3am with a huge cut across the back of his head. He was out of it when I heard him come in. I immediately rushed to the bathroom to see what was going on and started cleaning him up. He had been in a fight in our downtown. He was out with a group of his "friends" and one of them started a fight with another group of kids. My brother is not the kind of kid to sick and watch a "friend" get beat up, so he choose to get in on this fight to help out a "friend". He just remembers trying to grab the other kid off his "friend" and then he was smashed over the back of his head with a brick. His "friends" dragged him into their car and drove around aimlessly for two more hours while my brother was nearly unconscious. They are so lucky that he is alive. A few weeks later the court summons came along witht he police detectives. My brother has been charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon (one of the other kids is accusing him of kicking him). My brother swears he never kicked him. The court dates have been steadily coming every few months since last June and it is finally going to trial on January 21st. The victim who was supposedly kicked by my brother is no where to be found and hasn't shown up for court at all. My brother is scared to death. I have never seen him in this situation. He has heart pupitations and has been hooked up to heart monitor for 24 hours. He is in trouble. One of the good things is that he knows this. He knows he has messed up royally this time. He has actively admitted his problem and has stopped cocaine and slowed down on the alcohol. Instead of going to the bars on the weekends he comes to mine and my fiances home and works on his 1977 truck. He has made changes and I am beyond proud of him. He still has a journey ahead of him, but he is definately on his way into the right direction. I pray for him everyday that he cleans up his act and so far he is doing the right thing. Our of fear of him going away to jail I have been adding into my prayers that he doesn't go away. I think if he goes away it will discourage him and won't be the change he needs. I know he did wrong in fight, but I also see that he was trying to help another. My brother has a big heart and would give the shirt off his back to a person in need. He is in his early twenties (22 to be exact) and has made his mistakes. He is learning from them and if anyone knows him well it is me. I hope this is not a selfish request that I am asking you to assist me in my prayers of healing and quite literally for him not to go to jail. These are my prayers daily and I am requesting your help. Any prayers are so much appreciated by myself. I just pray that he finds his way. Thank you for reading and thank you for your prayers.
My brother went on a bad bing a year ago around the holidays. He would leave home (this is when we were both living with my father) and not come home for a day or two. We'd get no phone calls to let us know where he was... nothing. It didn't dawn on me until this started happening that there was something more going on than just alcohol. In the midst of a blackout last January my brother hit a parked car on the way home from the bar. The next morning he went out to his truck and had no idea why the passenger side of his GMC truck was totaled. It was at this moment that he admitted to my mother that was hooked on cocaine. He broke down to tears, probably the second time I've ever heard my brother to cry (the first being when my mom told him she was leaving our dad). My brother had a problem. He stopped drinking and doing drugs for about three weeks until he couldn't stay sober any more and dove back into the underworld. One Wednesday night in April he came home at 3am with a huge cut across the back of his head. He was out of it when I heard him come in. I immediately rushed to the bathroom to see what was going on and started cleaning him up. He had been in a fight in our downtown. He was out with a group of his "friends" and one of them started a fight with another group of kids. My brother is not the kind of kid to sick and watch a "friend" get beat up, so he choose to get in on this fight to help out a "friend". He just remembers trying to grab the other kid off his "friend" and then he was smashed over the back of his head with a brick. His "friends" dragged him into their car and drove around aimlessly for two more hours while my brother was nearly unconscious. They are so lucky that he is alive. A few weeks later the court summons came along witht he police detectives. My brother has been charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon (one of the other kids is accusing him of kicking him). My brother swears he never kicked him. The court dates have been steadily coming every few months since last June and it is finally going to trial on January 21st. The victim who was supposedly kicked by my brother is no where to be found and hasn't shown up for court at all. My brother is scared to death. I have never seen him in this situation. He has heart pupitations and has been hooked up to heart monitor for 24 hours. He is in trouble. One of the good things is that he knows this. He knows he has messed up royally this time. He has actively admitted his problem and has stopped cocaine and slowed down on the alcohol. Instead of going to the bars on the weekends he comes to mine and my fiances home and works on his 1977 truck. He has made changes and I am beyond proud of him. He still has a journey ahead of him, but he is definately on his way into the right direction. I pray for him everyday that he cleans up his act and so far he is doing the right thing. Our of fear of him going away to jail I have been adding into my prayers that he doesn't go away. I think if he goes away it will discourage him and won't be the change he needs. I know he did wrong in fight, but I also see that he was trying to help another. My brother has a big heart and would give the shirt off his back to a person in need. He is in his early twenties (22 to be exact) and has made his mistakes. He is learning from them and if anyone knows him well it is me. I hope this is not a selfish request that I am asking you to assist me in my prayers of healing and quite literally for him not to go to jail. These are my prayers daily and I am requesting your help. Any prayers are so much appreciated by myself. I just pray that he finds his way. Thank you for reading and thank you for your prayers.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Mary Aycock's Family
Do you ever have situations with your loved ones that you wouldn't think were believable if they were on a soap opera? Unfortunately, that is the story of a branch of our family.
It begins with my Aunt Billie. My father's sister is in her 70s. She believes that she has dementia and is losing her mind. She has attended church for at least the 34 years that I have known her, and to my knowledge her entire life. She talks alot about being Christian and living a Christian life, however, constantly worries about whether or not she is truly "saved". She has struggled with depression for her entire life and tends to put others down due to her lack of self-worth. She taught her daughter Beth that keeping a boyfriend was crucial to defining her worth.
My cousin Beth became pregnant in high school. She married the baby's father, Danny. After leaving Beth with a disease that prevented future children, Danny was put into prison. He gave up his parental rights to their daughter Ashley. After several years, Beth remarried a very Christian man, Steve. Steve is a wonderful man. He legally adopted Ashley. After several years of fertility treatments, he and Beth gave birth to a son of their own. About six years later, Beth's troubled soul abandoned her 16year old daughter and her 6 year old son. Steve cared for Ashley as best he could, but a teenage girl struggling with being abandoned by both parents was unable to live under the rules of a man whose version of Christianity did not allow women to wear pants or makeup.
Ashley now has three beautiful children Jade (5), Caden (4), and Landon (3). She also struggles with an addiction to Crystal Meth (am I not certain of the spelling...).
Jade, Cade, and Landon have had no stability in their lives. They have lived with Billie, Beth (and a couple of different boyfriends), Ashley, and Danny (and his current girlfriend) each, but to my recollection have not lived with any one for more than a few months in a row. They are adored at my family's small Baptist church where they attend when they are with Billie in north Alabama, however, when they are in Oregon or South Alabama or with Danny in North Alabama, they do not have the opportunity to attend church. They are currently living with their grandmother Beth in South Alabama.
Please pray for each of the adults in this situation. Specifically:
For Billie to overcome her depression and finally accept the free gift of life.
For Beth that she will return to living her beliefs and be strong, stable, positive influence on her kids and grandkids.
For Steve as he struggles to raise a now teenage son as a single father.
For Danny as I do not know how to pray, but specifically for overcoming a problem for pornography.
For Ashley, that she will find Christ and begin a new life.
And for her three children, that they will overcome their hardships and find the security that only Christ can provide.
It begins with my Aunt Billie. My father's sister is in her 70s. She believes that she has dementia and is losing her mind. She has attended church for at least the 34 years that I have known her, and to my knowledge her entire life. She talks alot about being Christian and living a Christian life, however, constantly worries about whether or not she is truly "saved". She has struggled with depression for her entire life and tends to put others down due to her lack of self-worth. She taught her daughter Beth that keeping a boyfriend was crucial to defining her worth.
My cousin Beth became pregnant in high school. She married the baby's father, Danny. After leaving Beth with a disease that prevented future children, Danny was put into prison. He gave up his parental rights to their daughter Ashley. After several years, Beth remarried a very Christian man, Steve. Steve is a wonderful man. He legally adopted Ashley. After several years of fertility treatments, he and Beth gave birth to a son of their own. About six years later, Beth's troubled soul abandoned her 16year old daughter and her 6 year old son. Steve cared for Ashley as best he could, but a teenage girl struggling with being abandoned by both parents was unable to live under the rules of a man whose version of Christianity did not allow women to wear pants or makeup.
Ashley now has three beautiful children Jade (5), Caden (4), and Landon (3). She also struggles with an addiction to Crystal Meth (am I not certain of the spelling...).
Jade, Cade, and Landon have had no stability in their lives. They have lived with Billie, Beth (and a couple of different boyfriends), Ashley, and Danny (and his current girlfriend) each, but to my recollection have not lived with any one for more than a few months in a row. They are adored at my family's small Baptist church where they attend when they are with Billie in north Alabama, however, when they are in Oregon or South Alabama or with Danny in North Alabama, they do not have the opportunity to attend church. They are currently living with their grandmother Beth in South Alabama.
Please pray for each of the adults in this situation. Specifically:
For Billie to overcome her depression and finally accept the free gift of life.
For Beth that she will return to living her beliefs and be strong, stable, positive influence on her kids and grandkids.
For Steve as he struggles to raise a now teenage son as a single father.
For Danny as I do not know how to pray, but specifically for overcoming a problem for pornography.
For Ashley, that she will find Christ and begin a new life.
And for her three children, that they will overcome their hardships and find the security that only Christ can provide.
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